The heat settles on the pavement, my children run and play along with the time. They enjoy a splash in the cool water of the lake while Mom and Dad try to fish. I take a photograph against the Colorado sunset sky during a constantly interrupted nature walk. I read a story as the night sets outside the curtains and the children dream of unicorns. So much time to enjoy but it always goes too fast.
I wear a skirt to combat the heat as we enjoy the shops and vendors at the Renaissance fair. I fix my daughter's dress which has been torn. I want to be angry, but she plays so hard, so rough, laughing all the way. I would much rather a rowdy, playful child than I would a clean and proper dress.
My daughter has her first moments in camps, making friends, laughing, journalling, and I find new reason to be proud of her every day.
My son learns to pedal his bike, takes his first swings at t-ball, and is nearly swimming. His smile is so bright, and I can only laugh when I see how goofy he is to wearing his Batman suspenders.
I have an angel and a clown, a tomboy and a prince, a scientist and a storyteller, and I could not be happier.
Then they fight. Sibling tittering that would drive the sweetest grandma in the world entirely bonkers approaching rage.
I find solace in the eyes of my love despite the struggles of the work that never gets done and the list of to-dos that fall to the wayside as the summer rushes on. He has learned to enhance my heart, he has the ability to pause a perfect moment and makes me capable, important and loved when I'm beginning to doubt myself.
He wears a matching shirt with my son, and he doesn't know it, but I revel when I see him beam as they show off their shirts--my two dear comedians.
When I am at peace, I am in the moment. When I leave my focus, I only see the things that aren't getting done, the endless worry, and the thought that I will never catch up with the list I must complete.
Then I sit back as the grill simmers and realize that the important things are getting done--there's not as much to worry about as I thought.
I just wish the summer wasn't passing so quickly. I want to marinade in the moments as my children grow, as my darling makes me laugh, and as the wind brushes my hair in the cool evening air on the patio. These are the things I will keep with me.
