Resolutions?

I know a lot of people who make New Year's resolutions and break them within a week, other people who swear against them because they're ridiculous, and some people who make a really good effort each year to improve something in their lives.

I generally shy away from the idea of resolutions, it's gimmicky, and who really remembers to make drastic change? I think the biggest problem is it's considered an unattainable goal, we set the bar really high so that when we break the resolution, it's over and we simply wait for the next year. 

I honestly have a lot of things in my life that need to change. I need to take better care of myself. I spend a lot of time working and rushing around for the kids, but as much as I wish, it's really not an excuse. In all reality, what good am I to anyone if i'm not taking the time to worry about my health and environment? What kind of message does it send to my kids that mommy doesn't take care of herself because everything else comes first? Not a good one, I'm pretty sure.

It's no secret I want next year to be different.

Before attempting to write resolutions or thinking of writing any, I need to make a list of the things I would like to see change. So here we go:

-I want to be more involved in the community

-I want to work on meeting new people, making new friends, and having productive/fun things to do when the kids are away

-I want to be more confident about my abilities. I don't want to delete stories I start to write, leave paintings unfinished, or be afraid to try new things

-I want my home to be more organized and clean

-I want to get rid of the things I don't need

-I want to only have things in my wardrobe that I like wearing

-I want to have healthier cooking options during the week

-I want to have more money in savings

-I want to feel respected and loved in any friendship or relationship

-I want to feel hopeful about the future no matter what happens

-I want to feel more balanced

-I want to feel good enough to exercise and not feel ashamed if I can't handle some of the activities that my friends can do

-I want to sing more, but not for karaoke--I really don't like the bar scene

-I want to spend more time outside

-I want to do more things that I haven't done before

-I want to feel happy instead of guilty if I reward myself on occasion

-I want to continue playing with the kids when someone comes to visit instead of blushing and feeling silly for goofing around so much

-I want to stop apologizing for the things I don't need to and apologize for the things I do instead of getting defensive

-I want to order new things when I go to restaurants instead of the same thing I've ordered every time I've gone there

-I want to say yes when people offer to help me

-I want to say no when people ask if I need the things they're getting rid of 

-I want to say yes because I want to, not because I feel like I have to

-I want to say no sometimes because it's really okay

So there's a start...just wish I could make a plan. Like many people, I know what's wrong in my life and the things I do that worsens those problems. I wish it was as easy as typing it up and posting it, but I have some serious modifications to try if I'm going to really throw out the old and start with the new.